Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Skin Games

I have really gross brown lumpy blotches on my face the size of nickels, paying the price for 100s of hours on a old Massey Harris tractor without a wearing hat I guess. They are a bitch to shave over and around. It does slow down my shaving. Family members pressured me to have them examined. I was certain they would have to remove half my face. Of course at this point in my life I don't really care; all vanity is long gone. I had a cute petite young Mayo doctor, who could have been my granddaughter. She treated me with proper respect - particularly after seeing my blood pressure. It was 124 / 64., good for 65. Fat though I may be, all that selective eating, beer drinking and bike riding has not been wasted. The ugly brown blotches on my face turned out to be actinic keratoses, glorified extreme liver spots, not cancer. They can freeze, scrap and laser my face and make it less repulsive. I remember seeing the old farmers in the church in Clarks Grove when I was growing up and pitying them for their beat up, weathered faces. phhuuwett! As a porcelain faced punk what did I know?! My spots continue to slowly expand and maybe at some point I'll have to deal with them. Unsightly though they may be, at least for now I'm wearing them as badges, awards , even rewards for living a full life. I'm good to go for another year.


Aside: You know how you see the old guys who quit getting haircuts and shaving? Moi'. Except I shave. But I do it for me, 'cause it itches, not for you! I tell myself the hair, the mustache and goatee, look European and sophisticated. But I know it doesn't. It looks like a homeless shag mullet. And it pleases me just a little every morning when I look in the mirror.

7 comments:

Jonny Hamachi said...

Whatever Lorna wants, Lorna gets
And little man, little Lorna wants you

reverend dick said...

One of those popped up on my calf recently. It freaked me out with it's rapidity of growth so I visited the dermatologist, who told me it was not melanoma (yay!) but a "barnacle on the ship of life" and that I had "earned it".

I had that ish froze right off. My legs are too pretty than to be about with messed.

Gunnar Berg said...

You are a wise man. I had an ugly black that showed on my legs a couple of years ago. Scary. It was gone as soon as I could get to a doctor. I suppose I'll get them frozen and a little laser clean-up too.

Silk Hope said...

TMI.

Gunnar Berg said...

mole! black mole!

Silk Hope said...

Uuggh. can we get back to our local cycling channels? Sorry Neil I live in Cali, we visit the dermo once a month. the scapel and "freeze gun" is like brushing our teeth.

keep doing tough.

Jack

Justine Valinotti said...

We all earn our spots, wrinkles and all of the other things that make our faces truly our own.